So it's been exactly one year and some change since I've been a ghost online. No Facebook no Instagram. Two social media sites that I could not live without since I was 13 years old. For exactly 12 years straight, I used social media like crazy. Documenting every moment of my life. Posting pictures and posting my every thought, not always good. I was also that person on Facebook stirring up controversial drama. The last few years of me being on social media I started to realize that social media was giving me tons of anxiety and I was starting to compare my lives to the lives of the people I was following. Once you enter your 20s, its like a race against time. Or at least, that's what it feels like. You feel like you need to have it all together and that is really not the case. However, social media always tends to make us feel like that is the case. So many of my high school peers were making great money, graduating with their 4 year degree, buying big houses, touring the world, and I was doing none of those things. Jealousy wasn't the emotion I felt, it was a sense of failure that I felt. I felt like I was not good enough. I felt like I did something wrong in the way I chose to live my life. Then once the failure feeling set it, it was anxiety. Constantly worrying about how many likes I got on a post. If I was relevant. Were people still into the things I was posting. Did people still find me funny. Did people still find me pretty. All of these things were things I constantly worried about while having social media. So I made the decision to get rid of it. I also found myself posting so much every day it was honestly ridiculous. Once I decided to leave, every one thought I was joking or that I'd be back in two weeks. I would always deactivate my page for a while and come back. This time, it was getting deleted. Yep, that's right. Gone forever. Once I left social media, I felt a breath of fresh air truly. I found myself not on my phone as much, being more productive, making better grades in my online classes, more focused, and most of all enjoying life's precious moments. I was one of those people who had to take pics and videos of everything I saw that I thought was cool and share it. Now, I was not inclined to snap and record everything. My phone stayed in my back pocket when we went and saw things that I would normally feel the urge to post. I felt more at peace. I was no longer seeing negativity everyday. I was no longer comparing myself to others. I was just living. And for me that is enough.
Now I have this beautiful blog where I can be myself and I can express myself without worrying about what others will say. This is MY place. My website. My baby. My journal. My thoughts. I don't feel insecure here nor do I feel like I need to impress anyone.
This is me.
So if you're wondering on if you should quit social media, my answer would be yes. You will have a sense of freedom from the world, I promise.